Thank You, from One Mom to Another

 

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Sherri Krewson Garner, Leader of the ASNC Crystal Coast Chapter, shared this post about her gratitude for another mom and leader.

I want to express my deepest gratitude to another chapter leader! In 2000, after going through a divorce, I moved from Lincoln County to the coast of North Carolina to be near my family. I had been my daughter Sydney’s advocate since she was diagnosed at age 2 as “mentally delayed” or having a mild intellectual disability. But over the years, things didn’t add up; she just didn’t seem to fit in that category. When Sydney was 11, I heard about Asperger’s Syndrome, and this seemed to fit.

As the years went on and the struggles continued, I found a local support group and we started the Crystal Coast Chapter of the Autism Society of North Carolina. I started out as secretary, became co-chair, and am now the leader of the chapter. As a chapter, we started with a support group meeting once a month. Then as we saw what families needed, we added meetings on topics such as IEPS and school issues as well as social activities. Once a month, we have a social event called Friends & Fun to celebrate birthdays, and we also have Music with Mary, a casual music therapy class. Our biggest fundraiser, the Crystal Coast Run/Walk for Autism each May, raises money that enables us to do these special events at little to no cost to families.

Being a part of the chapter was a help to me and my family, but when Sydney was 18, she began running away from home at night. I would follow her in my car down the highway and call the sheriff. They told me what I already knew: They couldn’t make her come home because she was 19 and an adult. But was she? Could she make the right decisions? Could she take care of herself? She didn’t have a job and hadn’t graduated school. I spent nights crying, feeling that after 18 years I had failed because in every IEP, my ending goal was for my daughter to graduate from high school. It sounded simple, but it wasn’t, and it was my goal.

Sydney said she wanted to live with her dad, so in the spring of 2015, I obliged and had him come and take her to live with him at the other end of the state. Even though we were divorced, he and I continued to work together for her sake and remained supportive of one another. But he was taking on a role that was foreign to him; until you deal with the issues every day, day and night, you can never truly understand life as a parent with a child on the spectrum. Sydney started having a lot of trouble at her new school and in her new home life with a parent new to dealing with these issues.

Sydney’s dad called asking what to do. I felt just as helpless as he did; I had walked in those shoes but did not have an overnight fix. So I got on my computer at 11 o’clock that night and searched for the ASNC Chapter in Lincoln County, thinking they could provide some support. I proceeded to write an email to Ginny Hall, who co-leads the Lincoln County Chapter alongside Kristie Robertson, asking her to please reach out to Sydney’s dad because he needed help and I was a six-hour drive away.

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Ginny and Sydney

Ginny was in my eyes sent from God! She helped my daughter so much, especially on school issues. They had hard times, but she never gave up on my daughter. She worked with Sydney’s father to find the resources he needed, including in-home treatment and medications. Ginny also became a true friend and confidante to Sydney.

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Sydney and her mom, Sherri

This June, I traveled to Lincoln County for my daughter’s high school graduation and to meet Ginny for the first time. I had been feeling so guilty, and thanked her for all she had done. Ginny said, “It takes a village to raise a child.” It means so much to me that she took time away from her family to help my family. Ginny Hall, I thank you as one autism mom to another and as one chapter leader to another!

It does not matter how we get to the IEP goal, just that WE DO! I only hope I support other families in my chapter in the same way.

 

Have you found an ASNC Chapter to be your “village”? The Autism Society of North Carolina has more than 50 Chapters and Support Groups around the state. These groups are led by generous parents or family member volunteers who join together with other concerned individuals to create a welcoming and inclusive community of support for individuals with autism and their families.

ASNC Chapters provide a place where you can:

  • Receive support and encouragement from families facing similar challenges
  • Share experiences, information, and resources
  • Raise awareness about the needs and the abilities of individuals with ASD
  • Learn realistic, practical solutions for autism-related concerns
  • Feel welcomed, accepted and understood

 Click here find a Chapter near you.

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